I have a date every Tuesday morning at 08:15.

I can be pretty shallow and sometimes I can be pretty judgemental.  Hence is the case with the swimmer. First thing he ever said to me was, “Do you know this is the fast lane”. I later noted it in FB by adding the line, “and apparently it’s the asshole lane as well”.

Then I saw him swim, the guy is a dolphin on speed. The dude totally kicks ass! This is the shallow part, because that made me like him, or at least made him tolerable.

If I had real depth his Aqua Man impression would not have impressed me. Did I mention he doesn’t wear Speedos. That may have been the point where my opinion of him flipped.

Physically not my cup of tea. To pasty white, shortish, balding, and hairy, really hairy, really really hairy. Which is weird, because in general swimmers wax.  But vat a touchas. I often have impure thoughts on our dates gazing at that well shaped touchas.

There is a reason I swim behind him, well that and did I mention he hands me my butt weekly on a pair of paddles and fins.  Today I think he was outlapping me 2:1 almost. The boy knows how to shake his booty (I wonder how often I’ll mention his butt in this post).

And yet strangely, I find myself totally attracted to the Swimmer, in spite of his freckles.

Sounds like the makings of the perfect relationship. One problem, I don’t know his name……..

Yes we’ve been dating now on Tuesdays for about 5 or 6 months. He shows up at 8:15 we do the “hey” and “hey” back thing and then submerge ourselves for 75  minutes. Then we do the “bye” and “bye” back thing.

And I’m a social idiot, because once he even offered to rub out a leg cramp for me. I just blushed and said it was fine. Yes folks, I’m almost 40 and still blush. In fact, even trying to get the nerve up to talk to him I blush.

Nobody believes how shy I actually am. I lack self-confidence when it comes to talking to people I don’t know. I stutter and babble, kind of. It’s why I don’t go to those single parties or groups. Once you know me I don’t shut up, but that’s the Borawick family curse. We’re not known for keeping our opinions to ourselves. Another aspect of Zen I need to work on. But I digress from the touchas, opps, task at hand.

I did grill the lifeguard about him. I only found out he was really nice and an Engineer. Of course he’s SW Engineer, what else would he be. Since the coachman, SW engineers seem to be my lot in life.

Actually the Swimmer was MIA for a month. I actually found myself getting depressed when he didn’t show up for the second Tuesday. How silly! I think I need to remind myself I don’t know his name. Actually in my head I refer to him as Arie (lion in Hebrew) because he’s so hairy.  Today he showed up, I actually perked up a bit, silly x 2.

In fact, we regressed today and didn’t do the hey thing.  But it’s fine because he’s back in the water and I was back to having impure thoughts. Never have a gazed on such an awesome backside, legs, arms, etc.

I’m so glad I’m not Catholic, otherwise I’d be spending a lot of time in the confessional.  I wonder how many Hails Marys I’d be in for. I bet it’s a lot.