Yeah, sure…..

Hey I never said it was true, just saying it’s a nice thought. So many reasons why Adam and I will never work out, mostly because he’s younger. Are you buying it? Never mind he’s got that sultry singing voice, better than John Meyer, who I also have a thing for…

There may be a theme or two developing. I like em, tall, dark and immensely talented (OK even my ex sings way well).  You know we’re back to the same thing, surfers with an attitude.   A silky smooth voice and some good ink is a killer combination for this chickadee.

Back to the point, he’s younger.  Apparently a 38 wanting to date a 42-year-old is asking too much. They want to date the 28 year olds (folks, I kid you not).  So at 38 I’ve peaked, note this use to  be a normal age difference.

But apparently, for 28 year olds, 38 is a turn on (yes I understand why). I suppose it beats the 56 year olds, and even they want to date 33 year olds.  So wow, just as I’m coming into my prime for the average divorced Israeli 40 something, I’ve passed mine.

What a sad friggen statement.

So here’s the deal, celibacy is for the birds. I finally get to the point, where I adore sex, and the well dries up.  I mean the let’s get drunk and <fill in the blank> can be found. But my Mama raised a bit different from that, it’s not in my DNA.

So I’ve been toying with the idea of finding myself an Adam Levine. A nice young lad with some energy to kill. You know, nice eye candy with the posterior to match.

In fact, last week while E and I were drowning our sorrows in some Cherry Beer, I told her she should just find a stud muffin until her next relationship rolls around. The logic being that if you’re feeding the beast, there’s less pressure to, well less pressure.  You can date, just to date, without taking it up a notch until you’re ready. Of course, she acted shocked, And we all know I blow a lot of hot air.

No doubt, most would find this conversation shocking. But I don’t think it is, I think it’s honest. Eventually we need to be comfortable enough with our sexuality to discuss it, otherwise, well it’s like my marriage.

Maybe I’m jaded, or maybe I’m just stuck.  Stuck is more like it, unwilling to move on to the next relationship, unwilling to invest emotionally. Unwilling to take a risk.  I’ve had the best, nothing is going to come close to the Packet Jedi, so why try. Why not just find a hottie.

Because at the end of the day, I’m not hungry enough. I think to be labeled a cougar you have to enjoy the taste of blood.  I’m a vegetarian and this limits my ability to pounce on pray.

Sigh, I think I’ll put my picture of Adam Levine from Tiger Beat back on the wall, sit back, and bat my eyelashes at it.